apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
