grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
