dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say đ
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now sheâs a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. âHigh maintenance hotâ doesnât even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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