Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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