And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize