I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
