butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize