I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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