Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
