no. you can't hotbox the world.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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