too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
