My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
