Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize