You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Even my vagina gasped.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
