I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
operation have a gay friend backfired
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize