If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
