i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
