Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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