I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
