Do you still have your period?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Randomize
