and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize