wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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