Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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