Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
