I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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