u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
