Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
