i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
