CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
