Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Randomize
