really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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