i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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