So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
