In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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