hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
