Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize