I want to have your abortion
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Randomize
