Hey man sorry I got all grabby
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
