Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Randomize