you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
