I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize