Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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