she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
sex in a hospital.. check
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Randomize
