No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
we're making bets on your personal life
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
