that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
