If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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