i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
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