At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
