Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
