i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
